Tag: Work

Difficulties

~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Miriam did not make it this weekend. She did not answer her phone, return calls or text messages. I was getting a little worried, so I phoned her husband, who told me in a muffled voice that she was in hospital with the little girl. I couldn’t understand anything else, so my active imagination went into over-drive. On Friday, and after many further unanswered calls, I received a message saying that she was in hospital looking after her daughter who has frequent nosebleeds. Of course her absence gave us a lot of problems, but I had worked myself into a worried frenzy, so when I finally heard from her I was relieved more than anything else.

Ron had to look after Robert for two days in a row, when I worked the long weekend shifts 14:00 to 23:00. I really do not like the long shifts anymore. The pressures of work and many other problems are taking their toll. I am trying hard not to transfer my feelings of stress to little Robert. He is getting less of me these days, so I have to make our time together count. The least disruptive shifts so far are the 08:00-12:00 ones. On these days I just wake up early and give Robert his breakfast. He stays awake while we have breakfast, and goes for his first nap shortly after I leave for work. I come home in time for his lunch and later we can take a stroll towards the ocean or to the park. Ron has to fill in for the bath and bedtime on the days when I work 16:15-20:15, and he doesn’t particularly like it. According to him, however, Robert enjoys their time together immensely. He bought him some new toys and clothes this week, and I can see how much he likes the new rattle toys.

These days he is starting to have some mobility, and when his rattle ball rolls he tries to follow it. The other day I put him in the middle of his play gym and went to fetch something from the kitchen. When I came back the play gym was empty, and the little one was on all fours underneath the table where I couldn’t see him from the door. I have to keep a watchful eye on him from now on. Soon he will start pulling things down or pulling himself up against coffee tables.

My friend Kirsten arrived from Germany on Tuesday; she is staying with Jackie. Robert has accompanied me on many visits with her, and whenever the weather cooperated we went for a stroll on the promenade or to the park. Kirsten manged to catch Robert in few interesting poses. For example his South African chilling mode: relaxing with feet up, and only the Castle Lager missing.

Kirsten brought with her some new presents for Robert: T-shirts, socks and a pyjama, all will be useful as the weather cools. Not to be outdone, Jackie chipped in and bought him a teething ring. It is the type that goes in the freezer or fridge and helps cool aching gums; Robert likes it. Mom bought a couple of summer things that he will use next summer at the beach.

Today’s funny picture: Robert crawling in the park. When I took the picture I did not see the comment that is showing right above his head, nor the wheel that he is dragging behind (the rattle ball).

 

Times Together and Times Apart

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Robert’s mom is back to work part time as of today. It is strange to show up at the office again and try to be part of the team. During the months that I was away a lot changed and I have to work for the first few weeks together with a coach. Dad has passed a milestone today as well, looking after Robert for almost five hours. He did not have a great success in putting him down for his morning nap, but I did not have any better luck either. By six thirty poor Robert was so whipped he went to sleep immediately after the feed.

I think we made some progress –hopefully- in finding someone to look after Robert for the weekends, when I work the longer shifts. Miriam is a wonderful lady, and I hope she will prove to be a keeper. The only problem is that she cannot arrive earlier than nine in the morning and has to leave by six thirty in the evening at the latest. This means that the pressure will be still on Ron to take over for roughly four hours per day. Unfortunately, I will face the same problem whenever I hire any African lady, because they rely on public transport, so this cannot be helped unless I quit. The other option is to hire an au-pair, who commands a higher salary than mine, and then it doesn’t make sense at all.

Robert and I still go often to the park to enjoy the warm autumn weather. These days, he is happy to spend longer times there and interact somewhat with other moms and children. Today I had a nice visit with a few moms, and Robert charmed everyone with his giggles and smiles. I managed to get home after a couple of loud squeals and we did not get a full performance of his crying orchestra. I think he is a very happy and content baby, especially considering the little sleep he got today. If he is just a little bit cranky then it is because of his aching gums.

Over the weekend Ron and I went and bought a new supply of clothing for the little guy. He has finally outgrown the outfits I received as a present for his birth. We also bought him a set of huge plastic keys, designed as teething aids, and a small tube of teething gel. I think his first tooth will be making an appearance before the end of the month.

Another milestone for today was Robert’s first tablespoon of butternut pumpkin. Last week I cooked the pumpkin, pureed and froze it in an ice cube tray. Then I emptied the frozen portions in freezer bags. This morning I put one frozen cube in the fridge to defrost, and I later gave it to Robert as a lunch snack. He enjoyed immensely, perhaps because it was still cold and soothing to his gums. Butternut is very popular with babies because of its smooth texture and sweetness. Tomorrow I will give him a larger portion.

The Doctor Said..

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This last week of November has been quite busy for all of us. I am still working on my translation assignment, and I am finding it very hard to stay concentrated while trying to keep Robert happy at the same time. Ron has his hands full trying to help out and keep everything else in order. I would have never been able to pull it off without him.

On Wednesday I had my dreaded interview at work. It went unexpectedly smooth, and I did not have to negotiate down at all from my initial request. I now have two additional months of leave. The finances have to be thought out and planned later, but for now Robert and I are sorted. When I return to work in March I might have the option of working half days which means that I can spend maximum time with the little monkey. In theory I can continue breastfeeding for as long as Robert wants, and I needn’t worry anymore about pumping breast milk.

The news from work was positive. I got a T-shirt, a pro-rated bonus for the eight months I worked this year, and an invitation to the year-end function. In short I was made to feel part of the team, which makes going back to work next year not a totally bad idea. The only technicality I need to grapple with in the next few days is the imminent expiration of my Dangerous Goods License on December 1st. People who work in the transport industry have to take a refresher course every two years to keep the certification current. It just happened that I had to do this refresher and test within the next two days.

I opted to take the test on the very next day, Thursday. I left immediately after feeding Robert at about two in the afternoon. The course was a module which I followed on a multimedia CD, after which I was required to complete a test. Finally my certificate was printed, and my license was brought up to date. The training module and test require one and a half hours to complete, but I needed more time, because I chatted to colleagues and superiors. As usual there was more than one crisis on the floor to scatter the attention. Near the end of the test I kept glancing between my cell phone and the clock, expecting a call from Ron with a screaming baby in the background. I was heading home on a taxi, when the call finally came. Ron had done his best to entertain Robert. He took him out for a walk and played with him, but once the baby got thirsty there was nothing he could do to calm him down. Poor Pea was hot and thirsty, and so worked up it took some time to get him relaxed again for his feed. All of us were exhausted by this exercise, and I am glad we won’t have to do it again. I was only away for a little over two hours, but obviously it was too long. Once Robert was fed he regained his good humour; Ron even got a rare laugh when he popped a plastic bag near him.

Today, we had another big excitement on the calendar; Robert’s three-month check up. Ron and I had a long list of questions for the pediatrician, and I added one more after inspecting an abnormal diaper surprise in the morning. The doctor put our doubts to rest: Robert was NOT teething, and the little white spot we saw was a normal discoloration on his gum. The mole on his thigh was nothing to worry about, and the mark on his back is not a mole, but a mark that will perhaps disappear in time. The doctor explained that a child is considered “moley” if he or she has more than ten moles over the body. Such a child requires further monitoring and dermatological tests, but at this point Robert did not fall into this category. My diaper discovery this morning was a sign of diarrhea, caused by a transient virus. It would only be a cause for concern if the diarrhea becomes severe and/or lasts for a longer period of time. We discussed formula, feeding schedule, and the introduction of solids. The doctor reiterated what we read in most medical books and childcare sites: Breast milk is perfectly sufficient for babies in the first six months of life, and no supplements or solids are needed before then. Furthermore he advised against any introduction of solids before four months. Our doctor said that he advises parents to start on rice cereal after four months if their baby wakes up several times at night because of hunger. When we told him that Robert has in fact started sleeping through the night, he said that it was impressive and a little unusual. We shouldn’t brag about it to other parents, he cautioned, because they would be murderously envious. The doctor carried on with Robert’s examination and wrote down his height and weight. The numbers were as follows: Weight 6005g; Height 64cm; Head circumference: 39.5cm. I realized with dismay that he has only gained about 100g since his last assessment nine days ago. He is still on the 50% percentile, but it is obvious that he hasn’t been getting enough food since he started sleeping in. I need to do something about it, perhaps feed him one last time before I turn in for the night.

Before we went home for the day we stopped at the post office. An old friend of mine from Johannesburg had sent us a little present for Robert. We opened the present as we were having lunch. It is something that Robert will surely have lots of fun with in the future. A big blue whale and three little whale pups, they are his future bathtub friends. For now he was just happy to practice grabbing their package and try to get them into his mouth.

Three Months: Growing Like a Bean Sprout

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This is the day we have been all waiting for, through long nights of battling with colic, and around the clock feeding. The book says that from now until about seven or eight months, babies are in their golden age. They stay put wherever you safely deposit them, and are mostly happy to watch the world go by and take it in. So how does our little pea measure up?

Colic is history. The bottles of gripe water and colic drops are collecting dust at the bottom shelf of our changing table. Things haven’t calmed down completely though, and Robert still has cranky episodes. These days he has taken to gnawing on fists and fingers while making complaining noises. It has reached such a degree that I suspect teething, but this mystery will have to wait until Friday when we visit the paediatrician for a check-up. Another big decision is coming up tomorrow. I will meet my management team at work in the afternoon, where I will find out whether my application for two additional months has been granted. If not, I need to add many questions to the paediatrician about formula.

Overall, we think Robert is developing well in the areas of gross motor function and social skills. He is quite active especially in the morning. Ron is trying to introduce him slowly to the play-gym and the ‘bumbo’ seat (see photo). Robert also recognizes mom and dad, and smiles a lot. I might have heard him laugh once, last week on the day after he had the injection. I was rocking him up and down and I think he got a little bit of a fright, and gave a surprised laugh. I also mentioned before that he definitely recognizes the sound of running water, and reacts with pleasure at the prospect of a ‘bath’. During the last couple of weeks he also started to sleep through the night. We can hardly believe it, but yes, he is put to bed at eight and only wakes up again at the crack of dawn at about four thirty. This is over eight hours of sleep, we are starting to wonder whether it was normal.

We took a lot of pictures today to celebrate Robert’s third month. Since everyone is supposed to look their best, Robert and I had many changes of outfits. The green theme we all ended up with was totally coincidental. These pictures made it around the world to Germany and Canada. Ron’s nephews in Canada commented: Cousin Robert is growing like a bean sprout. Great, maybe one day he will be as tall as daddy.

Thirteen Weeks : Are We Teething Already?

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Mom and dad have been busy this weekend. I got another long-winded translation projects, and I have been putting in too much time in front of the computer. Ron had a role in an interesting European ad, where he was an 18th century soldier, marching across a sun-burnt field. Robert was busy in his own way, trying to stuff fingers and whole fists in his mouth as we saw. I know that he is not supposed to be teething until around six to seven months but this activity, the slobbering, general crankiness, and a pinpoint of white on his gum makes me think otherwise. It would be a real shame, just as colic is about to end to have aching gums to worry about, it doesn’t seem fair.

Out of all the presents Robert got two weeks ago, the mobile is still the most fascinating. To spare our ears we only wind it up in the morning as we wash up and have breakfast. It keeps him busy and happy for some time, provided of course all his other needs have been taken care of. He is sleeping longer at night, and most of the times I have to wake him up at dawn for his early morning feeds. He slept through the nights a few times already.

Ron also has been trying to put him in his ‘bumbo’ seat for a few minutes at a time. He tires out quickly because his head is not totally steady yet, but he seems to like the sitting position. The developmental play-gym hasn’t been a favourite so far. He starts fussing as soon as he is laid down on it, especially when in the tummy position. When I put him on his back he doesn’t seem too interested in the colourful animals overhead, and he hasn’t reacted much to the ‘baby’ in the mirror either.

We did notice that babies this age have a very short attention span, and focus on one particular object excluding the rest of the world. For example, Robert has not yet acknowledged Petey the black cat. It is not possible to draw his attention to the animal when he is focused elsewhere. Petey for his part gives Robert a very wide berth whenever possible.

Today when we put Robert in the bath we could not help remember how small he was when we first bathed him. Actually it was Ron who bathed him in the first few weeks. I was too intimidated to try it alone, because he seemed so small. Fortunately we have the pictures to prove it : bath; mirror.

I just had to take some current pictures to illustrate our progress. In this bath picture Robert is in the middle of a full stretch. A few months ago he used to flop passively in the warm water, now he wants to kick and splash a little. I suspect the action will become even livelier in a few months’ time.

Twelve Weeks: Quiet Times

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I am still working to solve the riddle of a breastfeeding-working mother. Operating the manual breast pump turned out to be a no-brainer. I certainly don’t need to invest in an expensive electrical one. This, however, remains only one small part of the whole puzzle, as Ron correctly pointed out. I still haven’t figured out how to store breast milk and how to manage pumping at work. For once I tackled the problem by going directly to the source and asking for what I thought best, without second guessing what management might or might not approve. I wrote work and asked for two month of unpaid leave after the official end of my maternity leave.

The email went out to my supervisors last week, where I stated my request and suggested a meeting to discuss my situation. The week passed without any response and I had to call today for a fellow up, and my supervisor scheduled a meeting for Wednesday the 28th. I don’t have a feel for what their response might be.

Robert’s latest developments: Bringing his hands together, and folding his thumb between his fore- and middle fingers. In terms of appearance: More fuzz is sprouting on his head, and his eyebrows are starting to get some definition. They are still very fair, but I think they will be the thick variety inherited from mom.

We got into the habit of taking him into the kitchen during dinner preparation. He sits quietly and watches us, listens to the noises of pots, pans and clinking cutlery. We introduce him to the various smells of cooking and spices. He is unfazed by the strong smells of onion and garlic. In fact, I think he likes them. His responses to the different fragrances are interesting, and being our son, he must be used to the smells of curry and ginger, and the taste of them from breast milk. As he gets older and less fussy, I am less stringent now about my diet. I have stopped worrying about eating cauliflower, but I am still keeping away from cabbage. My mom warned me against green peppers, which I have avoided during the worst colic periods. Now I do eat it in salads, and it doesn’t cause problems to either me or Robert. In all it looks like things are settling down, and all three of us are starting to enjoy longer sleeps at night.