Tag: Friends

Difficulties

~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Miriam did not make it this weekend. She did not answer her phone, return calls or text messages. I was getting a little worried, so I phoned her husband, who told me in a muffled voice that she was in hospital with the little girl. I couldn’t understand anything else, so my active imagination went into over-drive. On Friday, and after many further unanswered calls, I received a message saying that she was in hospital looking after her daughter who has frequent nosebleeds. Of course her absence gave us a lot of problems, but I had worked myself into a worried frenzy, so when I finally heard from her I was relieved more than anything else.

Ron had to look after Robert for two days in a row, when I worked the long weekend shifts 14:00 to 23:00. I really do not like the long shifts anymore. The pressures of work and many other problems are taking their toll. I am trying hard not to transfer my feelings of stress to little Robert. He is getting less of me these days, so I have to make our time together count. The least disruptive shifts so far are the 08:00-12:00 ones. On these days I just wake up early and give Robert his breakfast. He stays awake while we have breakfast, and goes for his first nap shortly after I leave for work. I come home in time for his lunch and later we can take a stroll towards the ocean or to the park. Ron has to fill in for the bath and bedtime on the days when I work 16:15-20:15, and he doesn’t particularly like it. According to him, however, Robert enjoys their time together immensely. He bought him some new toys and clothes this week, and I can see how much he likes the new rattle toys.

These days he is starting to have some mobility, and when his rattle ball rolls he tries to follow it. The other day I put him in the middle of his play gym and went to fetch something from the kitchen. When I came back the play gym was empty, and the little one was on all fours underneath the table where I couldn’t see him from the door. I have to keep a watchful eye on him from now on. Soon he will start pulling things down or pulling himself up against coffee tables.

My friend Kirsten arrived from Germany on Tuesday; she is staying with Jackie. Robert has accompanied me on many visits with her, and whenever the weather cooperated we went for a stroll on the promenade or to the park. Kirsten manged to catch Robert in few interesting poses. For example his South African chilling mode: relaxing with feet up, and only the Castle Lager missing.

Kirsten brought with her some new presents for Robert: T-shirts, socks and a pyjama, all will be useful as the weather cools. Not to be outdone, Jackie chipped in and bought him a teething ring. It is the type that goes in the freezer or fridge and helps cool aching gums; Robert likes it. Mom bought a couple of summer things that he will use next summer at the beach.

Today’s funny picture: Robert crawling in the park. When I took the picture I did not see the comment that is showing right above his head, nor the wheel that he is dragging behind (the rattle ball).

 

Sitting Pretty

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Robert is now finding it easier to sit for a longer time unassisted. A week ago, it took his full concentration to keep himself balanced, now he is starting to play and grab for stuff from this sitting position. I still need to be around him to catch support him if he flops over unexpectedly, though.

While on his stomach he sometimes pushes up on his knees and arches his back, and then starts rocking his little butt forward and back as if warming up for a leap. A friend told me that this is a clear indication that a little one is warming up his engine and getting ready to go. It won’t be long before he crawls.

Last week we had one extremely hot day, followed by a muggy and cloudy day, then a rainy and cold day. It seems that we are already changing over to autumn weather, but none of us really mind that. Anything is better than the extreme heat.

On Saturday Robert was invited to his friend Demi’s first birthday. We got there a little late because I did not want to wake him up from his nap, but he still had a good chance to play and socialize with some young friends, and a few pretty girls too. My friend Britt organized the party at a kid’s venue, which has the correct toys and activity areas. The hire of the venue includes the use of all crockery, cutlery and the service of the cleaning staff. All one needs is the guests and some food. This is a brilliant idea, because it means that mom and dad get to enjoy the party without worrying about the cleanup afterwards.

Robert was one of the youngest babies at the party, this made his participation a little passive, but he did enjoy some new activities:

For example riding on a yellow snail

Hanging out with auntie Britt.

Pretending to be busy when the guys try to make conversation.

Getting all the attention of a pretty girl.

and chilling in the ball pond

Little Demi was born last year on Valentine’s Day, and she is now a perfect little personality, walking, playing, communicating and munching on popcorn ! They do grow very quickly. It will be still some time before my little one eats popcorn but he is enjoying his rice cereal, and I now give him a daily midday meal of three heaped table spoons.

I am still worried about how we will manage when I go back to work, and I definitely need to come up with solutions for the weekends when I work for the full eight-hour shifts. Ron now realizes that entertaining Robert is not so easy. He is becoming more active, more vocal and more demanding every week. He can also get very tiresome and irritable when he misses his nap time, which happens more often than not. He is also still drooling profusely, and rubbing his gums violently, which makes me think again of teething.

A Friend Comes to Visit

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Last night was a difficult one with Robert. It all started after a nice dinner of chicken satay and rice; Robert had terrible cramps and gas and I had to spend the night with him in the lounge, semi-dozing on the sofa while trying to keep him warm. Later Ron would tell me that the meal contained some shredded cabbage in addition to the spinach, which I did not notice at the time. Up until now I haven’t been extremely serious about cutting out the foods that cause gas. I always thought that if they did not affect me then they could not affect Robert, but yesterday was a wake up call. My indiscriminate eating habits have to be altered immediately.I woke up at 10:00, as my phone vibrated with an incoming SMS from my friend Britt, who said that she will be coming to see Robert this morning. Britt and I go back a long way, to the times when I used to work as a travel consultant in Johannesburg and she worked for the same company here in Cape Town. We shared a few trials and tribulations with our very difficult German tourists, and although we haven’t kept in touch all the time we always kept phone numbers, and knew about major events in each others lives. I was so lucky that we ended up living across the street from her house here in Cape Town, because she was instrumental in guiding me to a good doctor and hospital. She recommended necessary baby items to buy, and where to buy them; She even provided hand me downs: Clothes, a baby bath, magazines and books. I think of her as a sort of god mother to little Robert.

Today Britt brought Robert some nice sailor outfits, I think they will look great on him in the summer. She did not forget mom and dad either, and brought us a large ready-to-eat chicken pie. I quite enjoyed her visit, she is always full of positive and upbeat advice.

When Ron came back from gym he was very hungry, and the chicken pie was exactly what he needed, so we shared it for lunch. Ron has been taking strain with me whenever baby has a rough night. The lack of sleep affects him even worse because he drives his body extremely hard while working and exercising. Yesterday he was totally exhausted after his workout, so he had to take it slow at gym today, and tried to rest after lunch. In the meantime I went out quickly to the shops, and stopped at the post office to collect a parcel addressed to Robert.

The night passed peacefully without crying fits, but I had to get up three times to feed during the night. It was difficult, because each time I was pulled up from the deepest sleep.

More Presents for Robert

~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment
After a small respite of warm weather on Sunday, the weather man predicts another cold front on the way. The forecast until Saturday is bad, and there is still no spring in sight.I got an SMS from my friend Jackie around noon today. Robert was asleep at the time, so it was one of these rare occasions when I could come near my phone. Ron was at the gym, and I was catching up on my emails and blog. Jackie wanted to know whether she can come for a quick visit and I told her that this was a good time. We had a good chat over tea; I showed her the pictures of Robert from the hospital, and she told me about her new job which she was due to start on the 17th of this month. It was a good opportunity to catch up on news and gossip, as we haven’t engaged in our girls-only chats for a long time. Jackie also brought Robert some presents from her mother, nice rompers for summer, and his first noisy truck, which I suspect will become an annoying background noise sometime in the future.

One of my milestones for today was going to the Supermarket for the first time since I had Robert. Armed with my cell phone, I left the apartment during his nap, and went straight to the shop, zipping quickly through the aisles, to return exactly half an hour later. In addition to the regular staple foods, I managed to buy steaks for dinner and some sweets- a couple of chocolate coated oatmeal bars, and a small carrot cake.

Back at home I had a shower and removed the plaster tape around my incision. The incision was healing nicely on the outside edges, and the skin has knitted together well. However, the middle had shallow flaps, little open flaps in between the stitches. I was not impressed, because it seemed that I will be left with a tiny ridge of skin around the area. Ron commented that Dr. P. will definitely not qualify as a plastic surgeon. My belly was shrinking slowly but I still had to get used to its new shape; now I had an additional fold of fat right above the incision, as if the skin was stretched over a garden hose I wore around my hips. It is a small price though to pay for my little bundle of joy.

Robert was easy to work around today because he settled into a regular schedule of three-hour naps in between feedings of one hour each. He is slowly turning into a greedy feeder, and I am still dealing with the consequences of his hearty appetite on my sore breasts. However, it is a relief that he is over his hunger cry fits. He also went to bed promptly at dinner time, giving us the chance to have a peaceful dinner and enjoy tea afterward with carrot cake.

New Start ?

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I am writing this while the wind is blowing on the Atlantic Seaboard, fireworks are cracking in the darkness and lighting up the sky with frequent colour bursts.
Our new flat is really nice, it has a view over the water all the way to the other side of Cape Town, along the Atlantic coast to Table View. It is great to watch the ships sail by from my side of the window while I work on the computer, or look up Signal Hill as I wash dishes. The only negative thing about the flat, and it is quite an important one is that it lies on the juncture of two of the busiest roads in Cape Town, the traffic simply never stops.

The afternoon was nice and sunny today, and I spent some time with two nice women, an old friend and probably a new one, the company garden was full of people of every colour and creed.
I had lots on my mind so I did not really watch the people. The animal life though attracted my attention: doves and pigeons, squirrels, and mice. We saw one really big rat, larger than a squirrel, it competed with the furry guys over crackers and nuts, and most likely it was the winner.
There is also a large Koi pond teeming with little fish, the parents quite big, one of my friends commented that they would make great Sushi.
We had scones and tea, not quite a posh affair at the public gardens, but still a treat. And as we were leaving there was a wedding procession visiting the garden for photos.

The afternoon was unfortunately too short, and tomorrow is another day at work.

Cape Town Season of Heartbreak

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Tomorrow, I will meet Ron, my ex, for the first time in over two months. I still cannot imagine myself rebuilding a life with him, but he seems to be dedicated to the idea. I thought I might as well give him the benefit of the doubt. I am interested to find out what my reaction to him will be after all this time.I am not the only one who is suffering relationship trouble these days. Three of my friends are going through breakup at the moment. According to my best friend, Jackie, who should be an authority on the subject, it is a seasonal thing in Cape Town. October and November, are apparently the Capetonian seasons for broken hearts. Summer makes people yearn for change I suppose. It is also the time when all the rich young guys from Johannesburg drive down here in their Lamborghinis and Ferraris.

One of the three breakups brought an interesting aspect back into my life. Mr. Aquarius is single again. I almost feel guilty that the thought cheers me up, but I tell myself that, of course I am relieved for his sake. His was one of those yo-yo relationships where the up and down come at regular intervals, which is nerve wracking and emotionally draining. I should know because I have been there. But I am not telling the full story.
The real story is that, shortly after arriving here, I developed a crush on Aquarius. For whatever reason, he became the new flush in my cheeks, and the spring in my step. I enjoyed every moment of it – the childish blushes, falling totally silent or resorting to diarrhea talk, whenever he was around. I was so obviously infatuated, yet I did not mind. When my friends bickered me about him I just laughed; I knew enough to appreciate how special these fleeting feelings were. Things were put into perspective shortly thereafter. He was not interested, he had a girlfriend, and what the hell was I thinking anyway. I kept him in my mind, in one of those small back corners, reserved for my rare brushes with madness.

Jackie and I met him today for breakfast. Before the food order arrived, Jackie excused herself for a minute to buy some medication, and that is when he brought up the subject of his breakup with the girlfriend. I babbled like an idiot for a few minutes, as I usually do when I am left alone with him, and mercifully Jackie arrived before too long. He must know the strange bend in my mind. If it bothers him, he will find a simple way of avoiding me. Eventually, I will grow up and act my age – like I always do. I have always been cynical and pragmatic even in matters of love. My moments of madness were very few and far between. Yet I come from a culture which recognises about 50 different degrees of love, and sometimes I think that the love I read about in those classics does exist. And If it does it isn’t it a waste to settle for the mediocre ?

Aquarius might not be the real thing, but maybe I can relive those feelings again, one day, with another man ? I doubt that it will be possible for me to feel them for Ron. I should be working right now, but I find my mind always going back to Mr. Aquarius. He has resurfaced from the dark recessess of mind, demanding my full attention. The timing is strange. Why should it happen now, when Ron is trying to make his way back into my life ? Is Aquarius my defense mechanism against the past ? It remains to be seen.