Seven Weeks: Sunny Days Come at a Price

October 15, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

The sunny weather has been holding since the weekend, and it beckons us to get out of the cold flat. At this time of year it is so much warmer outside in the sun.

Last Saturday we managed to get out to the V&A Waterfront. When we arrived there in the early afternoon, the place was busy with tourists and locals. A group of singers from the Cape Town Opera was performing in the amphitheatre, and there were many street artists performing their acts: rope jumpers, African singers, marimba musicians, traditional and gumboot dancers among many others. Despite the considerable noise level, Robert slept soundly in the carrier, and we were able to enjoy the sun and breeze outside, as we walked around the harbour, looking at the boats, the seals and simply enjoying the happy vibe. We timed our outing to last two hours right after a feed, and therefore arrived home in good time and before Robert started to fuss with hunger, thirst or over-excitement.

Today was another sunny and breezy day, and I felt antsy to get out. I felt like doing some window shopping on Main Road in Sea Point, so I strapped up baby in the carrier and we went out on what turned out to be a very long walk. I browsed baby books at the book shop, stopped at the supermarket, and then again to chat with Jackie’s mother whom I met outside her hairdresser’s. Robert and I arrived back home two hours later.

During the late afternoon, I received my payback for this quiet and enjoyable outing. Robert’s witching hour extended past nine, and in the end Ron advised me to put him down in his crib and let him cry himself to sleep; he was obviously over-tired. I still find it very hard to leave the baby crying, but after feeding and changing and spending a couple of hours singing and rocking, I have in fact done all I can for him. When I finally steeled myself into leaving him be, he cried for some time, then gradually calmed down and settled to sleep for the night.

First Checkup

October 12, 2007March 23, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Today was the appointment for Robert’s first checkup at the pediatrician. We were out with him on the same location last Wednesday. We took him to the Well Baby Clinic, thinking that he was due for his first vaccination shot at six weeks. The nurse, however, said that at six weeks they only give two shots that are partially subsidized by the government, and recommended that we rather give him one combo vaccine at eight weeks. The combo vaccine is more expensive, but it is less likely to cause fever and side effects, and it gives all the required vaccinations in one shot instead of two. Sister B charted Robert’s height, weight and head circumference on his little growth chart. His weight was 4.52 kg which is exactly on the 50th percentile, while his height measured 57cm, and head circumference at 36.7cm. Wednesday was also a nice warm day, and Robert got to wear sweat pants without booties for the first time, and when we walked with him on the beach at Moullie Point, Ron rubbed some sand into his little feet to mark his first visit. Of course, such a busy day usually comes with consequences; Robert was brought completely out of sync, and we had a tough night with him .

After our experience two days ago, we were a little apprehensive of today’s trip to the hospital, especially since it will be longer than the quick assessment visits. However, as it turned out he spent the most part of the day in total relaxation mode. He fed without frenzy and then settled for long naps in his chair, waking up now and again to coo at us, and shower us with smiles or just sat there chilling and blowing spit bubbles.

Around noon we started getting ready. Robert had his bath, and we dressed him in his new summer clothes. I chose for him an outfit that has a picture of a little red Muppet monster, with the caption: “I’m a little monster”. I hoped to prove the opposite true by putting Robert in it.

Ron thought that we should check whether the pediatrician was running on time, and it was a good thing that we did because he was half an hour behind schedule. We had a slight problem there because I had booked a check-up with my doctor half an hour after Robert’s. Fortunately, my doctor was running on schedule and he was very quick as usual with the examination and tests. He was satisfied with my recovery and progress, and I had no complaints or problems either. During the past weeks the appearance of my incision improved dramatically. All the little flaps have now knitted together perfectly, and the tube of fat I had near the site of the operation has almost disappeared. There is only a small ridge of fat left, which, according to the doctor should go away slowly with regular exercise and massage. He gave me a sample of ointment to help the process.

Twenty minutes later, we were back at the pediatrician but we were in for more delays as he was called for a delivery. Robert could not be kept asleep indefinitely; Ron had to take him for a little walk-around while I was at the doctor, and he needed to be fed again as we were waiting for his doctor. When he finally came I was allowed to continue feeding in the examination room, while the doctor started answering a few queries we had. As far as we both could see Robert was doing well, but it was good to get the confirmation from the specialist.

The doctor made up his checklist and in the next thirty minutes he checked for reflexes, heart and

lung sounds, weight, height, and head circumference among others. In the end he advised us to do an ultrasound screening for baby’s hips. He did not feel that anything was wrong, it was only done to be on the extra safe side, since Robert was a breech baby. We thought that we should do the screening today while we were there, but at radiology we found out that only one doctor performed this test and he was away on leave for two weeks. Both Ron and I thought that the test wasn’t an absolute necessity so we decided to make an appointment for it at a later date.

The whole trip to the clinic and back took about two hours, and there was minimal fussing from Robert. He was very good the whole time, and especially in the car. However, when we arrived at home he was wide awake. Between us we tried to keep him fed and entertained, and in the end he went to sleep at his normal time, at eight.

Six Weeks : Colicky or What?

October 8, 2007March 23, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

I am now almost ready to admit that Robert is colicky. If he is, then there is some good news for us at six weeks: Firstly, we are halfway through this tiresome stage, and secondly it doesn’t get any worse after this.

The cause of colic is not known for sure, but there are many theories trying to explain it. According to these, the crying may be caused by any of the following: gas, immature digestive system, expanding lungs, misaligned limbs (in c-section babies), and/or overstimulation. Most of these theories are unproven, but in Robert’s case the most likely one would be overstimulation. We noticed that his crying got much worse on days when there was too much going on. For example when we go out for a long walk in our noisy neighborhood, or when he stays awake for too long without sleep. One particularly nasty episode of crying occurred last week after a long talk with my aunt on Skype. Ron often comments on how animated (and loud) my talks with my family are – this is a middle eastern trait, people in that part of the world cannot speak quietly. It is possible that Robert did not react very well to this excitement, especially since it happened dangerously close to the time of day when he starts getting cranky.

We have tried several strategies to deal with Robert’s crying. The most successful one so far is putting him in the baby carrier. This works very well, and whenever I start walking around with him he calms down, and falls asleep soon after. The only problem is that he wakes up as soon as he is taken out of the carrier. As a result, he spent more time sitting in the carrier than out of it in the past few days, especially when it is cold.

Despite my ample experience at walking around with baby in the carrier, I had a scary incident last Friday. I twisted my ankle while walking down the hill and went straight down on one knee. Fortunately, I held on to baby and kept my upper body upright. Robert bounced against the padding of the carrier, and wasn’t affected much. In fact, he only grunted, changed position and then resumed his nap, while I got away with a nasty scrape on my right knee. Ron also had an alarming experience. He was looking after Robert one evening while I was trying to get some sleep. Robert was sitting in his chair in the lounge, in a lively but non-threatening mood. Ron must have gone to the bathroom for a minute and when he came back, I just heard him exclaim: “Oh my God”, then he brought Robert over to the bedroom and started asking me tense question whether I took the baby out of the chair. He then told me that something awful had happened ! When he walked back into the lounge, he saw baby lying flat on the floor with his head underneath the chair. Of course, he panicked and it took him a few seconds to realise that baby was quite alright. Later we concluded that Robert must have gradually slipped down from his sitting position in the chair (which is designed to work as a rocking chair). As he slipped down he must have tipped the chair forward, so that its seat touched the floor and created a sliding surface. Thus he ended up on the floor without a thud or a cry. The incident made us realise the danger of leaving baby unattended even for a minute. It was even scarier for us because sometimes we put the baby chair up on our breakfast table while we are eating.

The weather is still cold. Sunday was particularly dismal, and it was on that day that I finally finished knitting Robert’s baby jacket, which I started two weeks before he was born. It turned out nice and he finally got to wear it today, thanks to the late arrival of spring.

On the brighter side of things, Robert is cooing, gurgling, and trying to make conversation. This is starting to happen now more often; once he gets his fill of milk he looks up at me and smiles and starts up with his side of the story. I always give him a playback of the sounds he makes. Ron for his part, swears that baby is almost ready to stand up by himself. When he holds him upright, Robert plants his feet on his lap and locks his knees to carry his weight on little legs. Ron also ‘exercises’ Robert’s muscles regularly, and the little one likes that. I can tell that he is an active little baby, and will take after his father in this respect. He will be quite a handful once he gets bigger.

Five Weeks: More Challenging Times

October 1, 2007March 23, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

The past week has been the most challenging time we had with Robert so far. The crying spells and fussiness has increased, while naps are becoming shorter.

The day starts quite early at around four, and feeding time stretches until daybreak. This didn’t pose a problem when Robert went back to sleep immediately after feeding, because I still managed to sleep in late with him. Now as his early naps become rather rare, I am left to struggle with morning grogginess, and by the time Robert gets his first nap of the day it is too late for me to go back to sleep.
At about six I normally bring Robert to our bedroom, where I can at least nod off in bed while he continues his feeding ritual, and Ron can help with a little entertaining or burping. We tried several strategies for feeding baby in bed. Lying down is obviously my favourite but it has the most disastrous consequences in terms of spit up in the middle of our sheets. Now I mostly prop him up on a pillow, while sitting up or semi reclining, and it works for both of us.

Later in the morning we go for a walk with baby, combining it sometimes with a shopping stop. Last Saturday for example we went for quite a long walk on Main Road, and it was fun to look at the shops while baby slept soundly in the carrier. The rest of the day passes peacefully, because both Ron and I help each other with entertaining the baby, changing his nappies and bathing him. The real fun however starts at around 5 pm, which has been termed ‘suicide hour’ by a friend of mine, more seasoned in the arts of motherhood. At this critical time between day and night, Robert gets completely out of sorts. Dealing with these latter hours of the day consumes all my remaining energy, and I stumble to bed almost as soon as Robert is put down. Ron and I rarely eat our dinner together these days, sometimes he actually feeds me a few bites to keep me going while I continue the protracted evening feeding session. I get my own meal eventually, but then it is either taken in great haste, or eaten just before bedtime.

All fussiness and occasional crabbiness aside, Robert is thriving and growing every day. The visible improvement, however, does not extend to his hair which is in rapid recession. When I spoke with my parents on Skype last weekend, my mother commented on how much he changed in ten days. I know this is true, because a few days ago I was in a rush and took him out in the baby carrier without putting the cushion of folded cloth under him. I noticed then that the top of his head is now higher than the the top edge of the carrier, and he doesn’t need the additional cushioning anymore.

Yes, the little one manages to exhaust the combined energy of both his parents, but we forget everything whenever he smiles and swear he is the cutest little guy. And of course when he sleeps he is positively an angel.

We Are Four Weeks

September 24, 2007March 23, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Today Robert is four weeks old; four weeks fresh as I like to say. Ron and I had another restless night, and thereafter it was decided that we cannot sleep with the baby in the same room anymore. It is strange that I can sleep through his grunts, while Ron can’t, so we both end up sleeping equally bad, because I wake up for Robert’s nightly feeding sessions, while Ron wakes up at every grunt and groan coming from the cot.

The solution is definitely to move the cot to another room, but it is easier said than done, the way our flat is laid out. The cot is now in the corner of our dining room/office which is technically the second bedroom of the flat. I have a feeling that I will have a harder time with this sleeping arrangement than the previous one, because I tend to worry if I do not hear baby noise at all. I am still not over my compulsive habit of getting up to check baby’s breathing every few hours. In fact, whenever I put him down at night I find that I can only go back to sleep once I hear him grunt.

I have also started to monitor what I eat more closely. Some vegetables that were harmless or even healthy during my pregnancy, now turned out to be no-nos for breastfeeding. The list keeps getting longer. I cannot even have Ron’s wonderful lentil soup anymore, but I cannot bring myself to give up garlic and onion yet, as they do not seem to cause much trouble.

Today is a public holiday here in South Africa, it is Heritage Day which marks the celebration of the diverse heritage of South African people, and it is one of the new holidays created for the democratic South Africa. Informally though it is known as ‘national braai day’ and we planned to mark the occasion (and Robert’s fourth week) with a braai of our own, weather permitting. Cape Town weather is still unpredictable, and it is disappointing to watch the weather forecast, when day after day Cape Town temperatures are barely in the teens while the rest of the country basks in thirty degree heat. For our braai today the sky cooperated, it was a clear and sunny with no sign of rain. The temperature though were around 16 degrees, quite fresh for this time of year.

Our landlady and her husband came to visit us during the afternoon and see little Robert. They brought him another fluffy teddy bear, so he now has a complete family of three (they are shown in the picture, and were named Pinky, Rusty and Canuck). Throughout the visit with our landlords I was busy entertaining, feeding and changing baby, and it was up to a very tired Ron to entertain the visitors for a couple of hours.

As the visitors were ready to leave Robert was finally ready to be put to bed, and then Ron headed to prepare our long awaited braai. Soon enough the briquettes were starting to heat up, and I wanted to head along and help, however our little sweet pea had something else in mind for me; he opened his eyes again and demanded more drinks. Ron prepared dinner by himself as usual. Half an hour later he came to say it was ready, but found me still feeding Robert, and getting exasperated with this. After all I spent at least two of the last three hours with Robert semi dozing at my breast, and I wanted us to have dinner together for once. We had planned to have some red wine with our meal (a first for me since I gave birth), and it was the first time we had a braai since Christmas ! In the end we managed it, sort of. Robert dozed in his car-seat, near the table and at least it was quiet throughout dinner, and we could watch some mindless television, the South African soap opera Isidingo. Of course, the little boss’s chair needed rocking occasionally with a free hand or foot, but it was a small price to pay for his silence.

The red wine we had for dinner was a year 2000 harvest which I bought from a wine farm in Cape Town in November 2001. We were still living in Johannesburg then, and I went on a trip to Cape Town sponsored by the tour company I was working for at the time. Interesting to note that the wine travelled from Cape Town to Johannesburg, then onwards to East London, and returned on a moving van again to Cape Town. We only had the pleasure of drinking it today, and we couldn’t have found a better occasion.

A Friend Comes to Visit

September 21, 2007March 23, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Last night was a difficult one with Robert. It all started after a nice dinner of chicken satay and rice; Robert had terrible cramps and gas and I had to spend the night with him in the lounge, semi-dozing on the sofa while trying to keep him warm. Later Ron would tell me that the meal contained some shredded cabbage in addition to the spinach, which I did not notice at the time. Up until now I haven’t been extremely serious about cutting out the foods that cause gas. I always thought that if they did not affect me then they could not affect Robert, but yesterday was a wake up call. My indiscriminate eating habits have to be altered immediately.I woke up at 10:00, as my phone vibrated with an incoming SMS from my friend Britt, who said that she will be coming to see Robert this morning. Britt and I go back a long way, to the times when I used to work as a travel consultant in Johannesburg and she worked for the same company here in Cape Town. We shared a few trials and tribulations with our very difficult German tourists, and although we haven’t kept in touch all the time we always kept phone numbers, and knew about major events in each others lives. I was so lucky that we ended up living across the street from her house here in Cape Town, because she was instrumental in guiding me to a good doctor and hospital. She recommended necessary baby items to buy, and where to buy them; She even provided hand me downs: Clothes, a baby bath, magazines and books. I think of her as a sort of god mother to little Robert.

Today Britt brought Robert some nice sailor outfits, I think they will look great on him in the summer. She did not forget mom and dad either, and brought us a large ready-to-eat chicken pie. I quite enjoyed her visit, she is always full of positive and upbeat advice.

When Ron came back from gym he was very hungry, and the chicken pie was exactly what he needed, so we shared it for lunch. Ron has been taking strain with me whenever baby has a rough night. The lack of sleep affects him even worse because he drives his body extremely hard while working and exercising. Yesterday he was totally exhausted after his workout, so he had to take it slow at gym today, and tried to rest after lunch. In the meantime I went out quickly to the shops, and stopped at the post office to collect a parcel addressed to Robert.

The night passed peacefully without crying fits, but I had to get up three times to feed during the night. It was difficult, because each time I was pulled up from the deepest sleep.

Expanding the Boundaries

September 18, 2007March 23, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Yesterday Robert turned three weeks. The focus of the past week has been his feeding schedule, and from my meticulous tracking of his feeds, I can now say that he gets between six and seven feedings a day. This means that on average he feeds every four hours, and naps for about three hours between feedings. Over the weekend my mom got her first look at baby over Skype, I was breastfeeding him at the time, and she commented how calm and quiet he was. I was lucky she said. On my worries about breastfeeding she said that my sister had to put both her boys on the bottle because her milk was not rich enough. I did not want to think about this option.

Today was the first hot day we had this spring, with the mercury climbing to 27 degrees. Ron and I decided that it was a perfect opportunity to ‘go see something different’ and ‘expand our horizon’ as he put it. We took a long time to decide which beach to go to; Ron does not like Camps Bay beach because he thinks it is too busy and open, and I did not think going to Clifton Beach Four was such a good idea with the baby carrier. In the end we went to Camps Bay and walked for some time past the busy restaurant strip. Even on this Tuesday afternoon, the beach front was busy, and it seemed that everyone was out to soak up the sun.

For us even going on a little trip like this involved a lot of planning. We had to take the car seat, the baby carrier – which we remembered at the last minute, and the nappy bag of course in case of an accident. When we finished our walk, we could not sit on the sand or put our feet in the water as we used to do. We just sat on the edge of the sandy beach, on a bench, watching families with older toddlers making the most of the sunny day on the beach. It will be a while before we could do the same with Robert.

On our way back home Robert started crying. I was sitting in the front seat for the first time, so I could not tell what was wrong with him. We tried to ignore our instinctive impulse to stop; Ron turned the radio on and baby’s cries were drowned by the music. Shortly before we arrived he stopped crying and went back to sleep, but by then it was time to wake him up again to take him out of the car.