Looking Back on 2007

December 31, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

I wanted to dedicate a post to 2007, as the year draws to a close. This has been a remarkable and special year for all of us. Not a day has passed since Robert’s birth when I did not stop to marvel at the miracle of his new life. I am endlessly grateful for the blessing of a healthy and happy baby.

There are of course the restraints, of less time for us, and less freedom. The increased burden of work and planning and the limitation of our activities, but all of these things do not change the fact that we are both very happy to have Robert.

My mirror image looks tired and sleep-deprived most of the time, but the shadows under my eyes and the small wrinkles on my face are marks of a mature woman, a woman who has discovered the deepest kind of love. The happiness shining from within me cannot be disguised by mere fatigue.

As I reflect on the year that passed I remember the nine months of pregnancy. It was an energetic, blissful and healthy pregnancy. I did not experience any of the common ailments; no morning sickness or nausea not even sensitivity to smells. I was as healthy as I ever was, more energetic, and my complexion did not suffer the slightest of blemishes. I was also lucky when my weight increased gradually and did not balloon out of control, this may be the reason why I did not have any stretch marks.

Fortunately our diet and lifestyle are normally healthy, so I did not have to go through a major change there; I have been a long-time fan of cereal or oats for breakfast, and drink milk regularly with dinner. I always had a healthy appetite, it became more pronounced as the baby grew. I admit to indulging my cravings for sweets and chocolates some times, but I also paid attention to the correct diet: I had two daily servings of milk, at least two pieces of fruit, lots of vegetables, and tried to eat fish at least twice a week.

On the whole I enjoyed the experience of being pregnant, and when my belly became big I sported it proudly while lugging myself (and baby) up and down the hill, and hopping on and off taxis. Yes, occasionally it was scary thinking how vulnerable I was against muggers, or traffic accidents, but I was cautious and hoped and prayed for the best. Initially there was the added worry about how healthy the pregnancy was, the risks related to my age, and other genetic factors, but these fears were set aside with every progressive test and screening. I loved going to see the little one on the ultrasound, and the new ‘photo’ will be pinned on the fridge each time. When baby started to have features we would discuss how big his/her nose was, and whom of us s/he resembled. For me personally the first ultrasound was the most touching and dramatic. It was my first appointment to the doctor, and I just had a positive result from a home pregnancy test. The baby was only 10 weeks, but I could already see him or her happily floating there, and moving tiny arms and legs. It was incredibly touching for me.

My doctor has been perhaps, exactly the type that I needed. He has seen it all, and never gave me a reason to worry or exaggerated any type of problem. He just took everything at his stride. From the outset he located what turned out to be the only problem I experienced with the pregnancy. I had a fibroid, located quite low in my uterus. On that first visit he warned me to prepare myself for the possibility of a c-section. However, he kept me upbeat and did not discourage my hopes for a natural birth until the last few weeks. At 38 weeks the baby was still in breech and there was not enough space for him to turn. The doctor considered it too risky to try and force the baby into the head down position, and I think he made the correct call by scheduling me for a c-section.

The pregnancy was also a time when I was most productive professionally. I continued to work until the last minute, both at my office job and my freelance translation projects. Ron supported me throughout all of this a 100%. My pregnancy helped me move from full time to part time work at the office, and it was a good reason to get out of working the extreme early shifts and night shifts. It was nice to get special treatment for a while.

Ron helped me keep active for the whole nine months. He initiated the regime of the daily walk and we followed it diligently every morning, shortly after daybreak, and up until the 27^th of August, the day we welcomed Robert.

In 2007 Ron and I had our last vacation as a couple, and for this special occasion we travelled as far as the Caribbean Island of Dominica. It was a very special trip, and it reminded us of what was really important in life, the simple uncomplicated pleasures of living, and the futility of running after material things. On our way back from the Caribbean we stopped in Berlin, and had a great visit with my family there. We were fussed over and I was treated like a little kid again, pregnant belly notwithstanding. I was about to become a parent myself, but I only appreciated this lifelong commitment when Robert arrived. It is much easier when you are the child, you can then afford to grumble at what you perceive as the unwanted ministration of the parent. I am just starting now to see the picture from the other side of the fence.

Our trip to Europe was touch and go until the last second, because up until the beginning of May I only had a temporary South African passport. I only received my permanent passport the week before we were scheduled to leave. I was finally a proper South African citizen after eight years of living in this country. This monumental event happened also just at the correct time, because baby is immediately eligible for SA citizenship.

For me 2007 was a tremendous year, it brought fulfillment to many of my dreams. I look back at it with fondness, and gaze towards the future with more hope. As Ron said, 2008 will also be Gr8.

Robert’s First Christmas – A Day of Mixed Fortunes

December 25, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ 1 Comment

I feel really bad that Robert did not get any presents for his first Christmas, I guess we were too caught up in buying his day to day stuff, and did not have time to buy something specific for him to open on this day. At one point I had elaborate plans to knit him a Christmas hat, or make up a handmade present for him, but somehow these never materialized. I promise that I will work to remedy this situation during the coming year, and make sure he has a full stocking and lots of presents next time. My excuse this year, is that he is too young to know any better.
Mom and Dad got nice presents; mom received something that she always enjoys… chocolate and sweets, while dad got an interesting book. Robert got to play with the wrapping paper, which caused him tremendous excitement and total over-stimulation.

I planned a visit to my work today with Robert. I figured it was a holiday and there won’t be many people about, in there won’t be a lot of work load on the floor, so Robert will not distract people too much, and won’t be overwhelmed with the noise and activity either. I was mistaken.

I carried him up in a quiet elevator to a very quiet building. Only a handful of people were working on the floor, but somehow he did not feel comfortable. He started crying soon after we arrived, with ear-piercing, panicky sobs. I tried to calm him down in the common area, without success. Women from the Israeli sales team came to see what is happening, one of them carried Robert and sang to him in Hebrew, and amazingly he calmed down for a minute or so before starting his tearful cries again.

I tried taking him out to the atrium, big mistake, his cries magnified and echoed and caused even more people to come and investigate. I never thought so many people would be working on Christmas day! Some people looked at me accusingly; others came with helpfully meant but useless advice: Give him his bottle; give him water; he is hot. Finally I retreated to the ladies bathroom. I thought it was a small space he could relate too, rather than the impersonal huge expanse of offices. It did not help much, and the only way was to get the heck out of there. Ron came to the rescue as soon as I phoned, and we deposited a panic-stricken Robert into his car seat. Ron spoke to him softly, but he still had wild eyes. He only calmed down to the rumble of the engine as we drove away from this dreadful place.

I still do not know what set him off, but I imagine it was too much of a change in his routine. When we usually take him out he is in the baby carrier, this time I carried him up, so he was outside the space he is accustomed to. Besides the environment was quiet and a little gloomy, different from the bright and noisy environment of our place or the shopping malls we are used to.

We drove to Sea Point promenade and walked around the Sea Point swimming pool. The day was cloudy with some fresh wind, but the pool was very busy. At this point it looked like our plans for a barbeque will go to naught, it was threatening to rain. Robert was quiet on our walk; it was an environment he is used to. There was even a group of Chinese tourists who fussed over him, the girls said he was cute, and a man took a photo of him in the carrier, and through all that Robert was his regal self, quiet and aloof, and watching the world go by with restrained interest. I had dressed him in his green and red ‘monster’ outfit, to honour the colours of Christmas, but during our walk the weather turned ominous again, and he was underdressed for the cold, so we had to head back.

At home Ron was faced with the problem of lighting the braai. Because of the unclear weather, Ron started the barbeque in a non-ideal location, on our covered balcony.

I might have swayed him into making this decision, which turned out into a near disaster. Poor Ron spent the afternoon battling the smoke which kept blowing into his face and eyes. To make matters worse, the pork ribs we bough were very fatty and turned black on the coals, poor Ron had to scrape them once they were done.

All through that I was entertaining Robert, I held him next to the window for some time to watch his dad preparing a feast that was not going very well. Miraculously, however, things turned out well in the end. Minutes before the meat was cooked, Robert settled for an afternoon nap, and Ron and I had one of our very rare leisurely meals. We enjoyed nibbling on pork ribs, beef short ribs, sausages with sweet potatoes and mashed pumpkin. The meal was accompanied by a wonderful red wine.

It was perhaps the only quiet afternoon we had on our balcony this year. Everyone was enjoying grits somewhere, and no cars on the road. It added so much to our enjoyment of the day. Mom and dad did get a special Christmas after all.

Week Seventeen : Christmas Eve

December 24, 2007March 26, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

I keep ranting here about the weather, almost as much as I speak about Robert. But coping with its many changing aspects has been an ongoing challenge in the past few weeks. I have given up on looking at the weather forecast; we just dress for whatever weather we have at a specific moment, keeping a contingency plan for sudden changes when we are out. We are both kept busy trying to keep baby cool, or making sure he is well protected from fierce sun or gusty winds.

Two weeks ago I lost a favourite possession to the ravages of weather. The Cape Doctor (our very own south easterly wind) took away my sun hat; it was last year’s Christmas present from Ron. I have worn it for less than a year, and only on special occasions at first. It was not the cheap cap that I wear on the veranda, and I was quite sad to lose it.

Ron taunted me endlessly about it for a few days, and then this week he bought me a new one from the V & A Waterfront. It is much better than my old had, and has a string that I can bind around my ponytail to prevent it from flying into the ocean like its predecessor. All is well in the world again.

All is well that is, except for the mosquitoes, which have now started to pry on poor Robert. A few nights ago, I had to strip him down to his nappy, so that he can sleep in the blistering hot evening. Bad idea, the next day he woke up covered in itchy mozzie bites on his tender skin. Now he goes to sleep in a long-sleeved shirt, zipped up in a light sleeping bag, but he still gets bitten on his little fingers, ears, and face.

In addition to my Christmas present, Ron and I bought some food for our Christmas braai (barbeque) tomorrow. We did not have a contingency plan for that one, in case the weather turns nasty as usual. We are still hopeful of sunshine, although we had a fair share of thunderstorms, lightning and rain today. The floods in the Garden Route area and a stormy Camps Bay beach were even on national news today. I suppose it will cheer up those who are spending the holidays at home. The upside of this cool weather for us is that Robert will get a break from mosquito bites tonight.

Sixteen Weeks: Developmental Milestones

December 17, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

This week Robert was busy with many monumental developments, and both of us were kept on our toes keeping track with him. His grasping skills are improving rapidly and he now reaches out to take a toy held to his fingertips. He spends a lot of time just looking at his hands, or regarding them, which is considered a very important step in his awareness of himself and how his body works. Grasping is becoming a conscious effort rather than a reflex. The little hands have been busy as usual exploring around his face and mouth, and now his ears have been added to the repertoire of toys. I saw him tugging at his ear a couple of times.

His exercise sessions on the play gym are becoming more eventful as well. He now likes spending time on his tummy and has mastered rolling from front to back, and attempts rolling from back to front using his hips and legs. Sometimes however he gets himself in a pickle while trying to do this. He was fussing at bedtime on one hot evening and ended up on his side. Ron came to the cot to find a very angry baby trying desperately to roll forward or backward without success.

Robert’s awareness of his surroundings is now very clear. He reacts to things he sees and hears and lets us know, in a not too subtle manner, when he dislikes something. Ron is sure for example that Robert recognizes the jingle of our daily South African soapie “Isidingo”, which we watched frequently while I was pregnant, and while in the past he did not react to television he now looks at it and shows interest in following the movement of pictures and colours.

The weather continues to drive us crazy. A blistering hot day is followed by a cold one, and the morning sky is never and accurate predictor of the day. Sunny mornings often give way to rain and thunderstorms, while a misty and cold dawn can later enfolds into a hot and humid day. On Saturday we witnessed the most amazing sunset, the pink hues of the sky turned the ocean purple. We only viewed this spectacle from our balcony, but it must have been amazing at the beachfront.

On one particularly hot evening I put Robert to bed without his shirt, and he was still too hot, and only when the air cooled down with nightfall. The next evening it was cool and I had to put him in a shirt and zip him up in a sleeping bag. This is not normal at all, looks like we will have interesting holiday weather.

Fifteen Weeks: Swim Time

December 10, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

We surely had the strangest weather this year. One day we complain how cold and miserable it is, then the next day we pray for a respite from the heat and humidity.

The days however are still getting longer and we have more daylight hours than we know what to do with, especially when baby wakes us at first light at four thirty in the morning. As of this week I am on holiday again until next year. I am dragging out my crochet and books and relaxing when Robert allows it.

Thanks to Ron, Robert is getting a lot of exercise. He now enjoys spending time on his play gym, and is learning to roll over from his tummy onto his back. His favourite position though is upright on his short little legs. He only needs a little support to his arms to carry the rest of his weight and he can remain upright for a minute or so before he slumps down. He can also now sit in his “Bumbo” seat for longer periods. He is always in a good mood, fusses only occasionally and then for a good reason. His routine for sleeping at night is now established, he is normally asleep by eight, provided he doesn’t get himself overtired. There are also the rare occasions when he is too hot and uncomfortable to sleep.

This week Robert got a chance for his first swim outdoors. We put his bathtub outside, filled with lukewarm water, and he enjoyed it immensely. He kicks the water with both legs pedalling so wildly that water splatters all over his face. His shock at the water hitting his face makes him splash even wilder, kicking his legs fiercely. We got the same reaction when the water was a little bit too cool, he started splashing wildly with arms and legs, but did not give a single moan of complaint.

Another important event this week was the arrival of his detailed birth certificate by registered mail. It was delayed in the usual muddle and inefficiency of Home Affairs. Perhaps this time though they had a genuine excuse; their offices in town were flooded due to a leaking pipe. We are actually lucky that the whole paperwork wasn’t lost in the confusion. The next important step will be registering Robert at the Canadian Embassy to get his Canadian passport, but this can wait until after the holidays.

Fourteen Weeks: Runny Tummy Time

December 3, 2007March 25, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

It is typical that we have to get sick right after a routine visit to the pediatrician. Robert had a runny tummy over the weekend; there were no painful cramps, but he seemed lethargic and lacking his usual spunk. Today he is a little better, but still not quite right. Hopefully this little thing will get sorted by itself.

Over the weekend we went to the Sea Point Christmas market. There were many interesting things to buy, home industries, jams, sauces, liqueurs, biscuits, chocolates, and lots more. I resisted the impulse to buy and buy. As in all Christmas markets things look pretty, but they are rarely useful. The only thing I would consider useful are the sweets and cookies, but Ron doesn’t like them.
On Saturday we drove to Camps Bay to see the Summer Festival at Camps Bay High School. The trip was a great flop, and at the school grounds there was only a huge sign announcing the cancellation of the event. We hadn’t planned anything else, so it was another nice and hot day wasted. At least we got to walk a little bit on the main road to Camps Bay, which was hopping at this time with tourists. We could have had more summer revellers if the weather wasn’t so fickle. The south easter was blowing again on the weekend, and it keeps pushing cold weather systems into the Cape.

Since our visit to the doctor I started giving Robert one extra feed before I head to bed. He still wakes up at the crack of dawn for his first meal of the day, but at least I know now that he is getting one more meal per day- better than last week. Now that his interest in the outside world is increasing he doesn’t seem to fuss too much about hunger. In fact, he keeps himself amused for a long time in the morning before he finally decides to raise his voice for our attention. He is slowly getting used to the play gym and a few times he carried on a conversation with his reflection on the play-mat’s mirror. He still prefers being held and carried around, though. When I carry him or lift him up, he has the annoying habit of turning his neck to glance backwards over his left shoulder. Initially I thought that he was trying to look at something from this uncomfortable angle, but whenever I turn his body in that direction, his neck remains twisted in the same position, looking backwards. I never know what he is looking for.

Ron is keeping track of Robert’s motor development, and I think his attention to exercising with him makes Robert quite advanced for his age. Even the doctor remarked on his good progress in that area. His head is steady, and demonstrates very little head lag when pulled up to a sitting position. He has mastered almost all gross motor skills for the average fourth months baby. He can now sit with support, and he quite enjoys being wedged in the middle of the leather sofa, or in the corner of his crib. His expression is normally one of amazement at the new perspective.

The Doctor Said..

November 30, 2007March 25, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

This last week of November has been quite busy for all of us. I am still working on my translation assignment, and I am finding it very hard to stay concentrated while trying to keep Robert happy at the same time. Ron has his hands full trying to help out and keep everything else in order. I would have never been able to pull it off without him.

On Wednesday I had my dreaded interview at work. It went unexpectedly smooth, and I did not have to negotiate down at all from my initial request. I now have two additional months of leave. The finances have to be thought out and planned later, but for now Robert and I are sorted. When I return to work in March I might have the option of working half days which means that I can spend maximum time with the little monkey. In theory I can continue breastfeeding for as long as Robert wants, and I needn’t worry anymore about pumping breast milk.

The news from work was positive. I got a T-shirt, a pro-rated bonus for the eight months I worked this year, and an invitation to the year-end function. In short I was made to feel part of the team, which makes going back to work next year not a totally bad idea. The only technicality I need to grapple with in the next few days is the imminent expiration of my Dangerous Goods License on December 1^st. People who work in the transport industry have to take a refresher course every two years to keep the certification current. It just happened that I had to do this refresher and test within the next two days.

I opted to take the test on the very next day, Thursday. I left immediately after feeding Robert at about two in the afternoon. The course was a module which I followed on a multimedia CD, after which I was required to complete a test. Finally my certificate was printed, and my license was brought up to date. The training module and test require one and a half hours to complete, but I needed more time, because I chatted to colleagues and superiors. As usual there was more than one crisis on the floor to scatter the attention. Near the end of the test I kept glancing between my cell phone and the clock, expecting a call from Ron with a screaming baby in the background. I was heading home on a taxi, when the call finally came. Ron had done his best to entertain Robert. He took him out for a walk and played with him, but once the baby got thirsty there was nothing he could do to calm him down. Poor Pea was hot and thirsty, and so worked up it took some time to get him relaxed again for his feed. All of us were exhausted by this exercise, and I am glad we won’t have to do it again. I was only away for a little over two hours, but obviously it was too long. Once Robert was fed he regained his good humour; Ron even got a rare laugh when he popped a plastic bag near him.

Today, we had another big excitement on the calendar; Robert’s three-month check up. Ron and I had a long list of questions for the pediatrician, and I added one more after inspecting an abnormal diaper surprise in the morning. The doctor put our doubts to rest: Robert was NOT teething, and the little white spot we saw was a normal discoloration on his gum. The mole on his thigh was nothing to worry about, and the mark on his back is not a mole, but a mark that will perhaps disappear in time. The doctor explained that a child is considered “moley” if he or she has more than ten moles over the body. Such a child requires further monitoring and dermatological tests, but at this point Robert did not fall into this category. My diaper discovery this morning was a sign of diarrhea, caused by a transient virus. It would only be a cause for concern if the diarrhea becomes severe and/or lasts for a longer period of time. We discussed formula, feeding schedule, and the introduction of solids. The doctor reiterated what we read in most medical books and childcare sites: Breast milk is perfectly sufficient for babies in the first six months of life, and no supplements or solids are needed before then. Furthermore he advised against any introduction of solids before four months. Our doctor said that he advises parents to start on rice cereal after four months if their baby wakes up several times at night because of hunger. When we told him that Robert has in fact started sleeping through the night, he said that it was impressive and a little unusual. We shouldn’t brag about it to other parents, he cautioned, because they would be murderously envious. The doctor carried on with Robert’s examination and wrote down his height and weight. The numbers were as follows: Weight 6005g; Height 64cm; Head circumference: 39.5cm. I realized with dismay that he has only gained about 100g since his last assessment nine days ago. He is still on the 50% percentile, but it is obvious that he hasn’t been getting enough food since he started sleeping in. I need to do something about it, perhaps feed him one last time before I turn in for the night.

Before we went home for the day we stopped at the post office. An old friend of mine from Johannesburg had sent us a little present for Robert. We opened the present as we were having lunch. It is something that Robert will surely have lots of fun with in the future. A big blue whale and three little whale pups, they are his future bathtub friends. For now he was just happy to practice grabbing their package and try to get them into his mouth.

Three Months: Growing Like a Bean Sprout

November 27, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

This is the day we have been all waiting for, through long nights of battling with colic, and around the clock feeding. The book says that from now until about seven or eight months, babies are in their golden age. They stay put wherever you safely deposit them, and are mostly happy to watch the world go by and take it in. So how does our little pea measure up?

Colic is history. The bottles of gripe water and colic drops are collecting dust at the bottom shelf of our changing table. Things haven’t calmed down completely though, and Robert still has cranky episodes. These days he has taken to gnawing on fists and fingers while making complaining noises. It has reached such a degree that I suspect teething, but this mystery will have to wait until Friday when we visit the paediatrician for a check-up. Another big decision is coming up tomorrow. I will meet my management team at work in the afternoon, where I will find out whether my application for two additional months has been granted. If not, I need to add many questions to the paediatrician about formula.

Overall, we think Robert is developing well in the areas of gross motor function and social skills. He is quite active especially in the morning. Ron is trying to introduce him slowly to the play-gym and the ‘bumbo’ seat (see photo). Robert also recognizes mom and dad, and smiles a lot. I might have heard him laugh once, last week on the day after he had the injection. I was rocking him up and down and I think he got a little bit of a fright, and gave a surprised laugh. I also mentioned before that he definitely recognizes the sound of running water, and reacts with pleasure at the prospect of a ‘bath’. During the last couple of weeks he also started to sleep through the night. We can hardly believe it, but yes, he is put to bed at eight and only wakes up again at the crack of dawn at about four thirty. This is over eight hours of sleep, we are starting to wonder whether it was normal.

We took a lot of pictures today to celebrate Robert’s third month. Since everyone is supposed to look their best, Robert and I had many changes of outfits. The green theme we all ended up with was totally coincidental. These pictures made it around the world to Germany and Canada. Ron’s nephews in Canada commented: Cousin Robert is growing like a bean sprout. Great, maybe one day he will be as tall as daddy.

Thirteen Weeks : Are We Teething Already?

November 26, 2007March 24, 2013 ~ marobbie ~ Leave a comment

Mom and dad have been busy this weekend. I got another long-winded translation projects, and I have been putting in too much time in front of the computer. Ron had a role in an interesting European ad, where he was an 18^th century soldier, marching across a sun-burnt field. Robert was busy in his own way, trying to stuff fingers and whole fists in his mouth as we saw. I know that he is not supposed to be teething until around six to seven months but this activity, the slobbering, general crankiness, and a pinpoint of white on his gum makes me think otherwise. It would be a real shame, just as colic is about to end to have aching gums to worry about, it doesn’t seem fair.

Out of all the presents Robert got two weeks ago, the mobile is still the most fascinating. To spare our ears we only wind it up in the morning as we wash up and have breakfast. It keeps him busy and happy for some time, provided of course all his other needs have been taken care of. He is sleeping longer at night, and most of the times I have to wake him up at dawn for his early morning feeds. He slept through the nights a few times already.

Ron also has been trying to put him in his ‘bumbo’ seat for a few minutes at a time. He tires out quickly because his head is not totally steady yet, but he seems to like the sitting position. The developmental play-gym hasn’t been a favourite so far. He starts fussing as soon as he is laid down on it, especially when in the tummy position. When I put him on his back he doesn’t seem too interested in the colourful animals overhead, and he hasn’t reacted much to the ‘baby’ in the mirror either.

We did notice that babies this age have a very short attention span, and focus on one particular object excluding the rest of the world. For example, Robert has not yet acknowledged Petey the black cat. It is not possible to draw his attention to the animal when he is focused elsewhere. Petey for his part gives Robert a very wide berth whenever possible.

Today when we put Robert in the bath we could not help remember how small he was when we first bathed him. Actually it was Ron who bathed him in the first few weeks. I was too intimidated to try it alone, because he seemed so small. Fortunately we have the pictures to prove it : bath; mirror.

I just had to take some current pictures to illustrate our progress. In this bath picture Robert is in the middle of a full stretch. A few months ago he used to flop passively in the warm water, now he wants to kick and splash a little. I suspect the action will become even livelier in a few months’ time.